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LIMITED EDITION- TIKTOK BLACKOUT BUNDLE: THE 12-HOUR SOCIAL MEDIA DETOX 🕯️☕
Date: January 18, 2025 – The day the universe decided TikTok was no longer a thing. And we all collectively asked, “How do we pass the time?”
You survived THE TIKTOK BLACKOUT. Twelve hours. No dances. No memes. No mindlessly scrolling through a hundred “how-to” videos on something you’ll never do. Just you, your thoughts, and your unhealthy relationship with your phone. You had to actually talk to people, remember?
But you made it through. And by the time 12:01 AM hit, you were shaking, but victorious. This bundle? Well, it’s the trophy. The tangible symbol that you somehow survived the social media apocalypse without completely losing your mind.
🕯️ THE 9oz CANDLE – With 60 hours of burn time, it’s your candle-shaped reminder of the 12 hours of hell you went through. Each flicker is a flashback to the deep, existential crisis you had when you realized you couldn’t even check TikTok for just one minute. Light it, breathe it in, and pretend you didn’t have that mini panic attack.
☕ THE 15oz MUG – Perfect for holding your first coffee after you managed to re-enter society post-blackout. Sip from it and reflect on the 10 meltdowns you had when you realized that scrolling through a dozen TikTok videos wasn’t an option.
WHY YOU NEED THIS BLACKOUT BUNDLE IN YOUR LIFE:
✅ 9oz Premium Soy Candle – Soy wax. 60 hours of burn time. Because let’s be real, a 12-hour blackout wasn’t enough suffering. We need more!
✅ 15oz Ceramic Mug – Large enough to hold all your rage and regrets (or coffee). Plus, it’s the perfect size to keep your hands busy during the next crisis.
✅ Perfect for Your Post-TikTok Detox – Candles and mugs for when the only thing getting you through is pretending you’re okay.
✅ 100% Cotton Wick & Premium Materials – It’s like your self-worth after surviving the blackout: clean and restored.
✅ Assembled in the USA – Because some things should never go down, like our sense of stability.
ZODIAC SIGNS & HOW YOU HANDLED THE BLACKOUT:
♈ Aries – Had a mini breakdown, probably yelled at the internet provider. Zero stars for emotional stability.
♉ Taurus – Slept through it. Woke up confused but at least got 12 hours of good rest.
♊ Gemini – Switched between 18 hobbies in 6 hours, none of which survived.
♋ Cancer – Cried. Maybe ate an entire box of cereal with no milk. Maybe called your ex.
♌ Leo – Made it everyone’s problem. You started a movement—#JusticeForTikTok.
♍ Virgo – Reorganized everything. The house is spotless. Don’t ask what your kitchen drawer looks like now.
♎ Libra – Spent 12 hours debating which show to start. Did nothing.
♏ Scorpio – Pretended to be cool about it. We know you weren’t.
♐ Sagittarius – Probably booked a one-way ticket to somewhere far away. Disappeared for a while.
♑ Capricorn – Actively thrived. Worked harder, probably while secretly judging everyone else.
♒ Aquarius – Got on Twitter and tweeted about how the internet was “the matrix” or some other conspiracy theory.
♓ Pisces – Meditated. Reflected. Found your inner peace. Then immediately downloaded TikTok again at 12:01 AM.
🔥 LIMITED EDITION – ONCE IT’S GONE, IT’S GONE.
We’re not restocking. Once this TikTok Blackout Bundle sells out, it’s over—like your sanity after the 12-hour blackout. So get yours now, before you’re left crying into your mug, reliving the horrors of having to talk to real humans.
Your Friends,
-The Bean Grind, LLC – Where coffee, candles, and a collective love for chaos bring us together.
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